The Washington Post's Style Invitational again asked readers to take any
     word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one
     letter only, and supply a new definition.  Here are the 2003 winners:

     1.  Intaxication:  Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you
     realize it was your money to start with.

     2.  Reintarnation:  Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

     3.  Bozone (n.):  The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating.  The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

     4.  Foreploy:&n! bsp; Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

     5.  Cashtration (n.):  The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

     6.  Giraffiti:  Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

     7.  Sarchasm:  The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

     8.  Innoculatte:  To take coffee intravenously when you are running
late.

     9.  Hipatitis:  Terminal coolness.

     10. Osteopornosis:  A degenerate disease. (This one got extra
credit.)

     11. Karmageddon:  It's like, when everybody is sending off all
these really bad vibes, right?  And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's
like, a serious bummer.

     12. Decafalon (n.):  The grueling event of getting through the day
consuming only things that are good for you.

     13. Glibido:  All talk and no action.

     14. Dopeler effect:  The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter
when they come at you rapidly.

     15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.):  The frantic dance performed just after you've
     accidentally walked through a spider web.

     16. Beelzebug (n.):  Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your
     bedroom at 3:00am and cannot be cast out.

     17. Caterpallor (n.):  The color you turn after finding half a grub in the
     fruit you're eating.

     And the pick of the literature:

     18. Ignoranus:  A person who's both stupid and an asshole.